Lori Day: All Men Are Violent. Now, Tell Me Again About How Feminism Is About Equality

I guess I’m a man-hater, writing a title like that, using my keypad to fire a shot across the bow of an entire gender. #NotAllMen are violent, and some women are, and we all know that, but this conversation is still the Internet equivalent of strapping on a suicide vest and detonating it with the click of a mouse.

Aw, here comes a goofy bitch who thinks that blogging on the internet is some glorious act of courage. And who thinks in hashtags. This is going to be terrible but it has to be done.

There is history. It is recorded and remembered and recounted and it repeats itself. There are studies and there are eyeballs—they reveal the same information. The media is replete with stories of war and genocide and rape and police brutality and mass shooters and ISIS and domestic violence. All of these articles are chock-full of hotlinks that act as supporting data to what is patently obvious. I’m not going to link to a single news story or piece of academic research because anyone who actually needs “proof” has Google, and I’m not doing anybody’s homework for them.

And one of the great feminist delusions reveals itself: violence happens because of men. Forget about mens rea, forget about politics, forget about natural resources, forget about land, forget about Islam, forget about money, forget about abuse of legal authority, it’s all the fault of that nasty Y chromosome. And the author believes this nonsense to be so self-evident that she need not offer any argument or proof in support of it. The reader should just agree with her because “Google It” and Google will not possibly produce any evidence that contradicts her conclusion.

Let’s see what the great and powerful Google has to say:

REFERENCES EXAMINING ASSAULTS BY WOMEN ON THEIR SPOUSES OR MALE PARTNERS: This bibliography examines 286 scholarly investigations: 221 empirical studies and 65 reviews and/or analyses, which demonstrate that women are as physically aggressive, or more aggressive, than men in their relationships with their spouses or male partners.


Male violence is the worst problem in the world because it is both catastrophic and undiscussable. For some reason there is plenty of handwringing and arguing over the religion of violence or the race of violence, as if those are the most salient or defining predictors of the brutality occurring on a global scale since the dawn of time. That the most common denominator of all violence — from a single beating to the murder of millions — is under-researched, rarely written about, and aggressively denied is hideous.

Look at me, taking cover under a feminist blog’s masthead, so I won’t be ripped apart by unmoderated male commenters on the vast digital ocean, bleeding out for a circling, hungry man mob. That’s my prerogative, and one I may someday relinquish if I become a glutton for punishment or simply decide that my one little voice is acutely needed…out there. For now, I huddle among the sane and the rational. I speak in a tent as high as the stars, around a fire glowing in the faces of those who wrap that canvas around themselves against an indifferent world where male aggression would tear it all down if left unguarded for only a moment.

Lori knows her position is not a righteous one and that she doesn’t have the strength of conviction to defend it. She snarkily says she’s hiding out on a feminist blog, but she really is hiding out in the safety of female herd because some evil man might come along and violate her sacred delusions with reasoning or a contrary conclusion. Which is totally the same thing and violently raping her on a broken glass table for three hours a la Jackie.

 This will not be solved in my lifetime or my daughter’s lifetime, or ever, without a serious come-to-Jesus reckoning among ourselves as a species. Until “male-pattern violence” can be spoken and written about openly, nothing will change. After all, if we can’t have a direct and public dialogue about who is committing the lion’s share of human atrocities, how can we ever hope for a kinder and gentler world?

Her daughter’s lifetime? For the love of Aqua Buddha, please let this woman be infertile. You know who commits the lion’s share of “atrocities” in human history? People who work for governments. What is a government except for organized violence? But feminists like Lori have no problem asking that atrocities be committed, or threatened on her behalf, whether it’s to get that alimony check, or to get a man out of a house paid for with his own money, or to separate a man from his children. Those are acceptable atrocities because a woman need not bloody her own hands to get what she wants.

I once read that when we mention “male-pattern baldness,” no one screams, “But not all men are bald!” Of course they’re not. But most people who lose their hair as they get older are male, even though a few are female. I suspect that most of the medical research going into preventing or treating male-pattern baldness is not running up against #NotAllMenAreBald trolling campaigns or accompanying death threats. There’s this thing called statistics, and for some reason men can acknowledge the relative prevalence of baldness among males as compared to females, and they can support research into a medical solution that is based on studying men’s hair loss. And for a lot of them, solving the male-pattern baldness crisis is much more important than solving the male-pattern violence problem. They parade their self-absorption without an inkling of their own shame.

Well, Lori is another goofy bitch and here’s why: She compares baldness, which harms no one, to violence, which necessarily harms at least one person. Baldness. Violence. Violence. Baldness. Apples. Sandpaper. Baldness, which is typically caused by genes. Violence, which is caused by some thought process. But remember, Lori believes that violence happens because men are violent, not because they went through a series of premises that led to a conclusion that said violence would be the best course of action, not to mention it completely ignores the rising tide of female violence.

And I can’t tell if Lori is “Bald-Shaming” or “Male-Shaming.” Either way, stop your shaming you goofy bitch.

I know a lot of men who care deeply about men’s violence against women and against other men, and I’m so very grateful for them. But too many men consider this a “women’s issue,” and oh my lands, what on earth does that mean? Do these men think we women can stop male violence on our own? If you want to be generous, you could say these folks are clueless or you could say they’re optimistic. Either way, you must also say they’re detached from reality.

Lori is long on platitudes and short on facts and reasoning. Lori abhors violence, yet her first focus is on violence against women when the primary victims of violence are men. In war, men are killed, but women get to keep living. The primary targets of crime are men. More men in America are raped than women. But because Lori, like a good feminist, is a gynocentrist, men’s lives, men’s happiness, men’s betterment, men’s existence simply doesn’t matter, save how it serves women.

Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent. Don’t ever forget it, and don’t ever underestimate it. It’s ruining the world. But I can’t end on that note, so I’ll end on this one:

Perseverance is more prevailing than violence; and many things which cannot be overcome when they are together, yield themselves up when taken little by little. ~Plutarch

So little by little is how we shall take them.

If violence is the last refuge of the incompetent, the primary practitioners of lawful violence, the government, must be incompetent beyond all reckoning. But what does it say about feminists who beg an organization perpetually engaged incompetence to intervene on their behalf?

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